Here is a transcript of the presentation:
Ryan Henry: So now I would like to introduce our speaker today who is a published author, a public speaker, and an empowerment coach. So, a lot of good talents to share with the world. So, Terri, you have the floor.
Terri L. Moore: Thank you, Ryan. And we’re recording this right? So if I go too fast and somebody trying to take notes or something that they can go back and listen to it right, OK, well today I want to talk to you about becoming the extreme unstoppable entrepreneur.
OK, entrepreneurship is an amazing thing. However, it can be challenging, right? And you can nod your head just keep the keep with me today with the audience. Just nod your head if you agree, put your hand up if you have a question.
But I will talk about the top six things you must do in order to move forward, to become that extreme unstoppable entrepreneur. And the first one is letting the opinions of others control your life.
OK, we are all guilty of this at times, but we need to learn how to let it go and it’s not what others think. It’s about what you think about yourself that counts, wouldn’t you agree?
You have to do exactly what’s best for you and your life, and not what’s best for anybody else. And I know for us women, we have a tendency to have a hard time saying no, right? Yes, I’ve had to learn that valuable lesson, and I’m sure, Ryan, you’ve had that same issue too, learning to say no.
Number two is the shame of past failures. OK, now your past does not equal your future. However, if you haven’t learned how to make peace with your past, then it’s going to be very, very hard for you to move into that extreme unstoppable entrepreneur.
So I want to share a little bit about my life. Since I know I’m meeting several of you, all of you for the first time, actually. So what could be holding you back from becoming that extreme unstoppable entrepreneur?
I want to share really briefly, my life started out with alcoholic parents and what happens is when you’re living in a dysfunctional family, it can cause a whole lot of emotions that could even be playing in your life today, so I want to share about.
My parents were Alcoholics, so that left me feeling abandoned because they love to have their alcohol more than they did loving their children and spending time with their children. So it also left me with rejection because I tried to do things with my mom and dad, but they would always say, oh, I gotta, we gotta go to this place or we gotta go to that place, why we’re going to meet some friends, and they just shoved me to the babysitter basically, and So what happened, is that left me with a lot of insecurity, that left me left with a lot of grieving because I didn’t have the parents that other kids in my neighborhood did. I had absent parents, basically.
And then Fast forward a little bit, I want to move on towards 27 years old. Yeah, I’m dating myself it’s way, way long ago. Anyway, I thought I met the man of my dreams. OK, we’re both fully in love and what happened was three months into our marriage, I found out that he had been carrying a very deep dark secret. He had told me that he had been in the Marine Corps for nine years. When actually I found out on my own that he was imprisoned for first degree murder.
Now, talk about your world just shattering like glass, my life completely changed. And because he had already threatened to kill his parents if they ever told me about this, everybody kept it very silent. I had no warning signs, no nothing, but unfortunately, I had to go back to him since he already threatened to kill my family.
So I went back and that’s when he started abusing me and beating me up every day. Verbally, mentally, physical, financial. He controlled everything. So where did that leave me with? That left me with rejection, insecurity, lacking confidence, fear, trust issues, abandonment issues, victimization, betrayal, guilt.
Because I kind of thought you know how we do, we beat ourselves up thinking what could I’ve done differently? Well, in this situation there’s really nothing I could have done differently. And then I went on to self-sabotage myself and that meant I became a full-fledged alcoholic, a drug dealer, the number one pool hustler in the state of Indiana, and those were all my coping mechanisms.
OK, so where did that leave me with? Anxiousness, broken down and then resentment towards my ex-husband, I have learned how to forgive him by the way. It left me with discouragement, grieving. It’s like a death.
My divorce was like a death. You know, and then self-punishing, self-pity and definitely critical on myself, because the last thing he said to me is ‘I don’t love you, but I don’t want anybody else to have to you’.
What do you think that does to our self-esteem? In my end, it just it warps us. And so I felt like I was a very, only half of a person.
So I want to go a little bit more, three days after our divorce was final, I went to a shopping center in Indianapolis. I’m not going to name the one because I don’t want anybody be scared if you go to it. Uh, but I was actually assaulted by a guy with a knife that tried to kill me and now what did that do?
That left me feeling a victim, victimized. You know, guilt, wonder how could I do it differently? Broken down, resentment and the list goes on.
Now the reason I brought all that up is because before I went on my own self discovery journey, that I teach my clients on.
Now I was always sick. I was, I felt always heavy. I didn’t have any energy. I couldn’t lose weight, nothing was working and then I went on this discovery journey to find my true self.
So I have a question I want to ask you, on a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the best, where do you see yourself loving yourself back in the mirror today?
OK, that’s a thought provoking question and I want you to kind of just maybe take some time and write that number down if you’d like.
And then, the reason I say that is because I asked my clients every single time that question. Because some of them will come to me and they’ll be like a 3, four, or five, and then so I’d really like to see my clients coming in like 5 to 9.
If if they come in and they’re at 10, my first question is then why do you need me? But then they have to they I want them to take a look back and make sure that they are really being true to themselves as well.
OK, I’m gonna move on.
The #3 is being indecisive of what you want. You will never leave where you are until you decide where you’d rather be. OK, so I also teach vision coaching and what that means is that I help everyone that I teach get that vision in front of them and go through what is holding you back in making that vision.
OK, like my vision board in 2021 that I started out with just to give you a very quick example.
I had a car on my vision board that I wanted. It was a Honda CR V Powder blue. Yeah, Honda and that was on my vision board and in February because I was visualizing that car in and we went to go look for a car that’s the car that’s now in my driveway, and so I was able to take my car off my vision board and then put it on my victory board.
And there’s a lot of factors that go into vision planning, but the first thing I want to say is this. If you have not silent that chatter of people that’s been having to hold over you for all your life, then it’s going to be very hard to see that vision clearly.
Does that make sense? Great, OK, I like to do an exercise with people, especially when I’m on stage, so I’d like you to do it with me if you don’t mind. This is called the 90 second rocking chair exercise. OK, so if everybody can close your eyes.
And I can see. OK so I want you to pretend like, I want you to imagine, visualize it. You’re on a rocking chair at your House of your dreams.
It could be in the South part of the United States. It could be in Alaska, but you’re on a rocking chair.
And so, I want you to really visualize what your life has been, how many things you’ve accomplished, what your business look like after you retire, and you’re 90 years old. Mind you then.
I want you to think about how your children turned out. You know, charities that you’ve given to and any trips that you wanted to go on, you have accomplished all those. If you’re visualizing this in, but let you just take a few minutes.
And just keep visualizing. This is your life at 90 years old. OK.
OK, could I get two of the beautiful women here? Share what you saw.
If you can unmute yourself and let’s talk, let’s talk about what you saw. If you don’t mind. OK, who wants to share?
Julie: I’ll go.
Terri L. Moore: Thank you, Julie.
Julie: Uh, to be honest, I didn’t see anything. It’s just something that I don’t want to look that too too far in the future and and map out where I feel like I’ve been at 90 years old because one thing I’ve learned with life is you don’t know where you’re going to be a year from now or week from now most the time. So I’m just being honest. I didn’t see anything.
Terri L. Moore: No, that’s that’s fine, that’s fine.
Julie: And just the uncertainty and I’m fine with that.
Terri L. Moore: OK, great. Dona?
Dona: I feel that Julie. I used to be that way and my husband has turned my wheels from that. So I saw a vacation home at the beach and one in the mountains. And I was sitting in the rocking chair beside my husband. We were just rocking and watching the scenery so.
Terri L. Moore: That’s great!
Dona: That is where I imagine.
Terri L. Moore: OK great, well you can move to North Carolina ’cause there’s mountains and beaches.
Dona: There you go, having both within minutes of each other.
Terri L. Moore: Yeah, actually yeah, absolutely OK. Well thank you for sharing that. Julie and Dona. OK, so #4, procrastination on the goals that matter to you.
OK, how many of us have been guilty of procrastinating? Yes, absolutely. Julie doesn’t procrastinate. Hallelujah, yes, let’s give her a hand.
Julie: Yeah no, I possibly put off things that it may be uncomfortable or unfamiliar with doing. But no, I don’t procrastinate ’cause I just don’t have time.
Terri L. Moore: Does anyone?
Julie: A lot of people do and their fine with it. I have a lot of clients that do it too so, but it’s OK. You know it’s just different personalities, right, right?
Terri L. Moore: Do you, did you know that fear is the number one underlining factor to procrastination? Fear, yes, I know. It’s like if you have a mountain to climb of paperwork or things like that. It’s just something that’s triggering you. It’s like, oh man, if I get this done then I’m gonna have to do that. And I don’t want to do that. So they start you start fearing.
#5 making excuses rather than decisions. That’s a big one for entrepreneurs in that we make excuses. Uhm, you know, there’s many times that I’ve moved out here and I have a pool right outside here, and so I think I’m going to want to work that day. And then, I look out and I go nope, not working today I’m going to the pool, because we also semi-retiring, so don’t so don’t quote me on that.
And #6 overlooking your victories and positive things about yourself. This is a big one when I’m teaching vision coaching. I’m always asking people what are your victories because Nine out of 10, they’re going to tell me their faults and their challenges faster than they are their victories.
And they’ve got to hang on to those victories, you’ve got to hang on to your successes, because that’s what’s going to drive you. That’s what’s going to drive you further.
The other thing is what you see often depends entirely on what you’re looking for when it comes to overlooking your your victories, you will have a hard time ever being happy if you are not thankful for where you’re at today.
And and I see that a lot in entrepreneurs when I’m coaching them. And so what I want to do is I want to give you some examples of how you can become that extreme unstoppable entrepreneur.
You must believe in the power of your own intuition. Vitally important, you must believe that where you come from doesn’t determine where you are going, and that’s what I was talking about when I coached people out of their past.
So they don’t really know where they’re going, but they now they do because they’ve gotten on the right path.
Believe that you are more powerful than your opposition.
Believe that your true real-ness, I love this one, believe that your true real-ness is your superpower.
OK, Ryan knows that I’m a real person and I will help people get out of their comfort zone. Otherwise what can happen, I’ve seen this in other entrepreneurs and personal development people is that you can come up with that impostor syndrome.
OK, you can walk around and and and let the world shout see one way but then inside you’re dying or you’re lonely or your bitterness or you have all kinds of strong emotions going on.
So believe in your super superpower.
Believe in the power of your why. Why did you start your business? Is your why that you started your business, is it strong? Is it medium or is it weak?
And this is how I gauge when I’m teaching workshops, if your why is weak, then you still are listening to too many voices in your head.
That’s telling you things like I can’t do that or I want to feel rejected or I have self doubt. And now when you come in and you’re medium. That means you’ve worked a lot on your own personal development, and then of course, when you’re strong, then that’s where people walk with their head high.
Their shoulders down and they know who they are and everybody around them knows that they know who they are.
Believe in the power of asking for what you need. OK, that’s a vitally important one, and believe in being courageous.
You know, as entrepreneurs we get, we get torn down a lot. You know, if things aren’t going our way then sometimes what do we do?
We start start self sabotaging ourselves saying negative things. You know, I can’t do this or you know, oh this isn’t going to work or I’m going to fail anyway and I used to feel that way many years ago, but I took the word failure out of my vocabulary and I replaced it with this is just a learning, loving experience that I will make sure that I do better next time.
Believe that haters are just confused supporters. OK, I don’t know about you when you started your business or you started going into this business. Did you have naysayers telling you that they didn’t think you could do it? I certainly did.
Uhm, believe in the power of living your values. Believe in your visions. That means only one thing, believe in yourself.
I believe that a power greater than myself has already given me everything I need inside.
And the final one, the number one way to become more of that extreme unstoppable entrepreneur is believe I am more than enough.
And again, sometimes if you’ve been raised like I was, I never heard that you are enough.
I always heard that I am not enough and that really, really hurts and so one thing that I’ve learned is the importance of continually having breakthroughs in your life.
So many times, we get stuck but we don’t know how to get from point A to point B, and that’s why breakthroughs are very important, because that’s a very quick mindshift. Of how you can get out of that rut that you’re in, if you’re in a rut.
So how many of you are ready for a breakthrough in your personal life? in your business life? Your career? in your relationships?
Anything else that matters, and even in your marriage, how many of you are you ready for a breakthrough? You have to ask yourself that question.
So what I do, I offer a 30 minute complimentary coaching session. It’s a discovery session. I ask several questions and then you do most of the talking and I’ve been very blessed to be able to help hundreds and hundreds of women and men come up with their breakthrough.
I love watching those a-ha moments, that they’re like, oh my gosh, now I see why it’s clicking, you know, and then I help them silence that chatter so I have a four step coaching program that I use. And if you want any more information, just let me know, but I would love to do a complimentary session with you. You have nothing to lose, but maybe a whole lot to gain.
So thank you so much for this time. I appreciate it.
